Monday, September 13, 2010

Learning to forgive

*** We are extremly blessed and honored to have Jason, his daughter Alicia (Class of 2013) and their whole family as part of the Animas High community. They continue to be in our thoughts and prayers as they continue on their healing journing. Truely an inspiration for us all! ***

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Learning t0 forgive
Family turns to native traditions to heal
by Patrick YoungHerald Staff Writer
Article Last Updated; Sunday, September 12, 2010 12:00AM
Photo by STEVE LEWIS/Herald
Kimberly Armstrong, right, informs her son, Noah Hotchkiss, 12, center, that the red and blue colors of his blanket represent the warrior society as Noah holds onto ceremonial feathers before his recognition by the Gourd Dance Society on Saturday afternoon at the 90th Anniversary Southern Ute Fair Contest Powwow. In back are Noah's father, Jason Hotchkiss, left, and Noah's sister, Alicia Armstrong, 15. Noah lost the use of his legs in an accident that claimed the life of his stepmother, Cassandra Yazzie-Hotchkiss.
STEVE LEWIS/Herald
Alicia teases Noah before his recognition by the Gourd Dance Society.

Courtesy of Jason Hotchkiss

Nine months after his wife was killed in a tragic car wreck, the healing process is far from over for Jason Hotchkiss and his family. But rather than harbor ill feelings toward the driver of the other vehicle, 19-year-old Joseph Montoya, Hotchkiss and his family embarked upon a journey of reconciliation and forgiveness.
Cassandra Yazzie-Hotchkiss, a prominent local Native American activist, was killed Nov. 16, 2009, in a head-on collision with Montoya on Colorado Highway 172 near Oxford. Hotchkiss' 7-year-old son, Dante, and two stepchildren, 9-year-old Amada and 12-year-old Noah, were injured in the wreck. Her oldest son, 13-year-old David, was not in the vehicle. Noah's and Amada's biological mother is Ignacio resident Kimberly Armstrong, who declined to comment for this story.
Amada and Dante both suffered head trauma. Noah's spinal cord injury left him without the use of his legs.
Because the accident took place on Southern Ute tribal lands, the Southern Ute Police Department handled the investigation. Few details of the wreck were released, and the department has not returned calls for comment. But in a recent interview, Jason Hotchkiss shared details of the wreck and the aftermath.
"It is important for people to understand the situation," he said. "A lot of people just don't know what happened, (and) they don't want to ask me, obviously."
Hotchkiss said he doesn't blame the tribe for remaining tight-lipped about the matter.
"Their sovereignty is such an important issue, and it's important for them to protect that," he said.
Hotchkiss said Montoya, who had flu-like symptoms at the time, had just driven his girlfriend to work at the Sky Ute Casino in Ignacio after working a graveyard shift himself. On his way home, Hotchkiss said, Montoya fell asleep behind the wheel of his pickup truck, drifting across the center line and colliding with Cassandra Yazzie-Hotchkiss' Subaru Legacy. Drugs and alcohol were not a factor, he said. Montoya could not be reached for comment.
Montoya pleaded guilty to vehicular assault, but rather than facing jail time, Hotchkiss asked the court to consider taking a different approach.
A good path
Not wanting Montoya's life to be ruined by one mistake, Hotchkiss proposed a plan that borrowed heavily from traditional native customs.
"If it hadn't been us that Joseph had run into, (Cassandra) would have been the first person to try to advocate for a good path for this," Hotchkiss said. "It's what Cassandra would have wanted."
He said Montoya and his mother, also present at the sentencing, immediately agreed to his plan.
"Their counsel had suggested that they don't take it, which is his job, but they heard it, and I think they saw in it a path that was beneficial for everybody," he said. "It was wonderful how supportive the Southern Ute court was. ... If we had been outside of the tribal court system, it would have been difficult to pursue a path like this."
The yearlong process requires Montoya to perform extensive volunteer work for Native American advocacy groups. Cassandra Yazzie-Hotchkiss had been an outspoken advocate for Native American causes, and it is her husband's hope that Montoya's volunteer work will further that mission.
"My greatest hope is that he'll become some great change agent in his life, become a real asset to his community, and take the spirit and enthusiasm Cass had and continue to apply it," Jason Hotchkiss said. "There's a lot of work to be done."
In addition, Montoya must bring livestock to his wife's grandmother.
Throughout the year, Montoya, Hotchkiss and his family will be receiving therapy.
The final phase of the plan will occur next spring when Montoya and his family will travel to Durango and prepare a meal for Cassandra Yazzie-Hotchkiss' family and friends.
"That's the time when we hope (Montoya) is able to walk away feeling forgiven and people who have been impacted and who are harboring anger for whatever reason will be able to walk away from it feeling OK," Jason Hotchkiss said.
Huge adjustment
Even with Hotchkiss' genuine desire to forgive Montoya, he admitted that life has been rough for his family.
In addition to the loss of his wife, the family also is dealing with residual medical problems from the accident.
Amada has some lingering issues as a result of her head injury, and Noah still is without the use of his legs and requires a wheelchair.
"We went to the doctor once every two years to get shots, and now we're at the doctor's office eight, 10 times a week," Hotchkiss said. "It's been a huge adjustment for us, financially, obviously. ... It just is what it is, and we'll make it through."
Through it all, Hotchkiss said there has been a tremendous outpouring of community support.
Within two days of the accident, a group of Native American students from Fort Lewis College, his wife's alma mater, had raised $4,000, which helped pay funeral costs.
Spearheaded by the local ministry Patrick's Crossing, a group of local churches organized to provide the family financial support, which Hotchkiss said has helped him make his mortgage payment, keep the lights on and focus energy on his children.
Durango resident Mark Katz, whom Hotchkiss said he had never met before but once played bluegrass with his uncle, showed up one evening with a "very generous" check for the family.
"It's a testimony to Cass as much as anything - just how powerful a person she was and how many lives she touched," he said.
Shriners International has been providing free medical care for Noah at its Philadelphia-based pediatric hospital dedicated to spinal-cord injury rehabilitation. Hotchkiss is optimistic that stem-cell research someday will yield a cure for Noah and allow him to walk again. Because the organization is funded entirely through private donations, it is not subject to federal restrictions on stem-cell research.
"The Shriners are an incredible organization, and we're so fortunate to have Noah working with them," he said.
'To walk in beauty'
Despite everything, Hotchkiss is optimistic about the future.
"In the Navajo Way, they talk about walking in balance, walking in harmony with our surroundings," Hotchkiss said. "That's what they call the Beauty Way, to walk in beauty, and that's what I'd like to see for my family and especially Noah."
In Noah's case, he uses the word 'walk' literally.
"I want to see him walk again, and that's one of the things we hope for," Hotchkiss said. "But regardless, we're going to roll in beauty if not."
Hotchkiss believes forgiving Montoya is an important step in moving past this tragedy. He knows it is what his wife would have wanted. And whatever the future holds for this family, he has the utmost faith they will persevere.
"I guess mainly I don't want to, and I don't want my kids to harbor hate," Hotchkiss said. "Life is hard. ... Sometimes terrible things happen, and sometimes they happen to us."
pyoung@durangoherald.com
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 4:03:29 PM
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mtnjoy says...
You are beautiful, Jason!! You are a light shining in the darkness.
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 3:08:05 PM
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worried says...
You Jason are a very good hearted person. Cassandra is always going to be with you. To forgive and feel no hatred is above and beyond. Maybe we all can learn by you. My prayers will go out to Noah and that miracle will happen someday.
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 10:37:26 AM
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Tomas Cruz says...
Wow! This is an amazing story. One of defeating adversity, dealing with with the loss of a loved one and most of all forgiveness. Mr Hotchkiss is an amazing man who has taught this community a HUGE lesson. I have a renewed sense of compassion after reading this story. I have a renewed faith in my fellow man. Thank You
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 9:59:29 AM
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humbled says...
This family truly restores faith in just being human, kind, and caring to people. We all have a lot to learn from this tragedy and triumph.
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 8:39:24 AM
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Cheryl says...
What a wonderful, uplifting article to read, first thing in the morning. I have great respect for Mr. Hotchkiss and his family. I hope people will take this lesson to heart and see the good that comes from the Traditional Native People. God Bless all who are involved in this great lesson in life.
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 8:15:48 AM
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Jennifer says...
I see now how this sort of plan can be so beneficial to society & spirit. I am thankful to have read this article this morning. These families will indeed feel recovery from utilizing plans like this and their society benefits as well. Thank you Herald for posting this enlightening and uplifting story of forgiveness & healthy choices being made in our community.
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 7:52:48 AM
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Sara says...
Fatherhood is precious
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 7:46:55 AM
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Local Dude says...
Many Blessings upon this Family. Wonderful to read about a Family with a Hero for a Father, tempered by the incredible sadness of the loss of a beautiful wife. Today, I weep for him and his children.Life is short, but Mr. Hotchkiss is doing it right. Who could deny he is a True Warrior?
Sunday, September 12, 2010at 6:09:06 AM
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Anne says...
Thank you for showing me what it means to be a True human being. Peace and respect to you and your family, and to Montoya and his family too.